In a Relationship . . . With the Internet

I admit I really enjoy the place we are in right now with technology and the internet. I am fascinated by the ever-changing technological advances, the new and fast-growing social media channels (hello Pinterest), and the way in which information is exchanged today. I enjoy learning and experiencing what is new out there, what I like to participate in, and what I don’t. My iPhone is never far from my side and I do find myself pretty tied to the networks out there.

But lately I have started thinking about that magical day when I will just decide I don’t need it all anymore. When I’m old and retired and my perception has shifted, there will come a day when I say, “I’m done with the technology! Unplug me!” Will I be 70? 80? I don’t know. All I know is that I think about that with a smile. I think about a time when all of this doesn’t matter and what matters is who is beside you, who is visiting you, what you did that day, what you experienced that day, and if you are happy and content.

Until then, I’ll have fun - and keep learning - because I do need it for my job and my future career. And I’ll just look forward to the day when I don’t even think about logging onto ANYthing. Instead I’ll relax, calm down, slow down, and not worry about a thing. J

When do you think you will unplug from The Matrix?

The Old Tree and The Wind

Our Tree That Fell

Last week, a freak weather system brought the strongest winds that our area has seen in a long time. This mighty wind took something from us. It blew in with a force that wasn't taking no for an answer, and took down our oldest, tallest, and biggest Spruce tree. I can't describe what a shock it was to see it gone from the horizon of our yard. This tree was special. It was on land that was one of the original homesteads in the area. It was around 100 years old and 95 feet tall. It was one of the oldest, and possibly THE oldest tree in our little town. It was a fixture of our property, a home to the birds and squirrels, and something I stared up at too many times to count.

I guess I've always gotten a little attached to the trees around me. When I was a kid, my family owned 40 acres in Mid-Western Colorado. It was all natural, the only structure being the footprint of an old cabin, and a caved in wooden entrance to an old mine. It was beautiful land and we had so many family camping trips and picnics there over the years. There was evidence that a stream used to run through it, because there was a long ravine running through the property, a small trickle of a stream during wet years, and the location of the mine was right next to all this. But what was really striking about this particular area was the huge Spruce that was perched on the edge of the ravine. It was a blue Spruce, tall, straight and majestic, much like the one in our yard. However, the tree was right on the edge of the ravine and the dirt was eroding away, and about one quarter of the root system was exposed, with the trunk of the tree just barely on the edge of the ravine.

So if you came at it from below, in the ravine, you could sort of climb up underneath the tree. You could literally climb up the roots (one even bent at a 90 degree angle and made for a step) to the base. Then you got to the edge of the ravine, and the flat shelf above it was completely enclosed all around by the low, wide branches. You could hoist yourself up on the ledge and now be under the tree on flat ground. And the area around the base of the tree was all clear except for a thick cushion of needles. So a child could fit under there and move around and play, and not be seen at all from the outside, since the thick branches brushed the ground. (Is this making any sense? Hard to describe) OR, if you came at it from above, up on the flat ground, you could walk up to one side of the tree where the branches didn't quite touch the ground and formed a natural part, and you could duck down, crawl in, and gain entrance to the secret area under the tree.

As a kid, this was a wonderful place for me. Especially as an only child who had to entertain herself. And I would for hours, making up scenarios, talking to imaginary animals, and taking special things in there with me that I would leave for the next visit. My parents and I worried that it would fall. Each time we came back, I would strain my neck to see out the car window as we came over the hill, but that big tree always stood. I worried so much about it falling that I developed this ritual that only a child would execute. Within the mine tailings was lots of mica - Fool's Gold. You could scoop up a handful and sift the dirt through your fingers and the tiny flakes would sparkle in the sun. I thought this was gold for sure. I figured gold must have some sort of magic properties, and that it could surely help the old tree stay strong. So I would cross the ravine to the mine tailings, gather two handfuls of tailings and cross back to the underneath of the tree, and carefully sprinkle the dirt and gold dust on the exposed roots of the tree. I remember doing this many, many times one summer each time we visited.

My family eventually sold the land, and the tree never fell while we were there. And at least in my mind, it never will. So when I'm sad about losing our current tree, I'll think about how my relationship with trees started and try to remember that Mother Nature says when it's time to go.

The Sad Night

Nature, or (Disney) Nurture?

You know how sometimes a certain theme or topic keeps reoccurring in your life and it keeps coming up enough that you feel like you should stop and devote some time to it? Well lately for me that has been the topic of little girls going through a 'Princess Phase'. I have several friends and acquaintances who have little girls between the ages of 3-5. They have each told me on separate occasions that their little girl is going through a SERIOUS Princess Phase and they sort of roll their eyes when they tell me.

But what really made me take notice was one of those people saying that they don't really know how their girl became obsessed because they don't let her watch TV and rarely any Hollywood movies. He said he recognized that she had seen the Princess paraphernalia in stores, and her friends were into them, but he was just surprised that she got SO into it, when they didn't even encourage it in their house.

So the question becomes; is there something inherently within little girls that kicks in around this age and they are completely drawn to super girly things and fairy tales? Is it the gender part of their psyche taking hold and staking it's claim? GIRL! OR is it the Disney marketing empire, shoving it's princess crap at girls of this impressionable age everywhere you go and you just can't escape it?

And of course there is the appeal of the fairy tale in which the Princess lives, where everything turns out wonderfully and it's all pink, and rainbows, pet tigers, and vodka .  . . oh wait, that's MY fairy tale.
So that part does make sense. Princesses are involved in good bedtime stories and happy endings.

But is there more to this fascination? Have you noticed most girls go through this phase? Why do you think that is?

Humble

Portion from the next chapter in my novel. Will be out of context of course.

Fire. When I arrived, wherever I was, the first thing I saw was fire. I was so startled that I tried to turn and run. When that failed I tried to adjust to what was being shown to me. But my view was hazy and I wanted to rub my eyes and blink. I could tell I was inside a burning building, walking quickly down a hallway that was filling with smoke. The fire was up ahead, bursting out from a room and into the hallway, and running up the walls like a reverse waterfall. My new body seemed shorter and I was glad to see that the walk of this individual was normal and steady. I wasn’t sure if it was a man or woman yet, all I could see was the occasional raised hand, covered in a thick glove up over the coat.

We walked quickly but calmly, going into each bedroom we came across, and opening each and every closet door. The rooms were so far fire-free, but the blaze beckoned up ahead. When we entered a room that was farther from the roaring fire and it was quieter I realized why the vision was hazy. The firefighter had a mask on, and I could also now hear the person breathing steadily through it. The breaths came quicker than normal, but still controlled. We quickly shoved a twin bed aside to ensure no one was under it, threw open the double closet doors, and peered within the adjoining bathroom, all within five seconds. As if delayed a bit since my arrival, the person’s emotions abruptly slammed into me. It was possibly the strongest feelings I had felt yet from a person. There was no mistaking what I was sensing. It was pure and undeniable determination. The kind where you know you are really good at something and nothing makes you doubt yourself. It was focus that comes from so deep within you that you can see or hear nothing else but your goal. I could feel the conviction of what this person believed, and felt no wavering in that conviction.

As we re-entered the hallway and got closer to the fire I heard the sound of a voice in my head, and thought at first that it was my host speaking.

            “Ken – you find her?” a man’s voice asked. There was a sense of controlled urgency in the voice. I realized it was a voice in a headset within the helmet.

            “Not yet.” my male host answered.

Do What You Love, or Love What You Do?

Maybe it's the new year, but I've been thinking a lot about careers lately. Maybe it's because I'm getting older and I am thinking about where my path should go next. They say if you can find or create a job around your passion in life that it will never feel like a job and you will always be happy with it. I wonder how many people achieve this?
How many people feel that they are in THE job that utilizes their full potential and satisfies their soul? Are you? If not, how close are you?

Hello 2012

Happy New Year. I have big pupils.

Come to IKEA; Have Your Patience Assaulted

IKEA came to Denver a couple of months ago and you just can't miss it. I mean you can't miss it driving down I-25, in either direction, from miles away. It's enormous, and so is the signage.

Never having shopped IKEA before, we figured we would go see what all the fuss was about. Plus we found some shelving on their website that we wanted. Thus began 2 of the most frustrating hours of our weekend/week/month. First mistake: we went on a Saturday.

Let me break it down for you:

1:30 - Had heard about their famous Swedish Meatballs in their restaurant and that they were a must try. Figured this time of the day wouldn't be super busy for lunch. Drove around and around on the first floor of the parking garage, no open spots to be had; cars slowly winding everywhere. Inadvertently ended up in the line for the exit. Oops. This would be the first of many lines to wait in that day. And perhaps was a sign from the Shopping Gods that we should just LEAVE right then. Seeds of doubt are planted.

1:45 - Went over and parked in the parking lot of the store nearby, many open spots, short walk to the IKEA entrance, no oppressive parking garage. A few others were doing it too, we felt super smart. Upon entering and seeing the escalator completely jammed with people, the rows and rows of carts, the huge signs to direct you, and the abundance of people, we knew this was unlike any other store we had been in. Seeds of doubt are germinating.

1:55 - Find the restaurant right upstairs, which is really just a huge cafeteria. We start to wander in, meatballs on our mind. "Line begins over THERE," a IKEA employee tells us and points across the room. We make our way over THERE and stop in our tracks when we realize the mass of people we are looking at are in line for the cafeteria. The line snakes back and forth like the DIA security line. We shuffle into place without a word, just staring helplessly. I am starving after all and didn't eat much earlier because I knew we would be coming here.

2:06 - We have moved 20 feet. We estimate there are about 80 people in line. Have commented on the lack of air conditioning/ventilation in the area about 5 times. Is positively stagnant and humid. Seeds of doubt are breaking through the surface.

2:08 - In a near claustrophobic panic we decide to bail out of the cattle line and quickly duck under the strap. Are too hungry to shop without food so we decide to go back outside and eat at Rock Bottom, then return with new vigor. Become briefly lost on the way downstairs. 

2:17 - At a table in Rock Bottom, cold drink in hand, meal on the way. Ahhhh. Better.

2:47 - Back at IKEA. Ready to do this.

2:57 - Deep in the gauntlet. Following the tiled path not unlike herded cattle once again. There are so many people, and people all moving at entirely different paces, that it is tough to actually shop. There is also so much to look at. We deviate off the path and can get around a little better. Notice the good prices. Also notice the not-so-good quality of goods. Seeds of doubt are growing.

3:10 - Looking for the section where we will find our shelving. Refer to master map and determine we need to go down to ground floor. Temperature remains above average in heat on entire floor. Go down to ground floor and temperature is much better. Whew.

3:20 - Still SO many people. Keep getting stuck behind Mr. & Mrs. Turtle who shuffle along, stopping to stare right in the middle of the path. Find our shelving! Yay! And no one is shopping in this little corner! We are also after the glass spice jars that will go on the shelves. We start to grab packs of 4 in a bit of a hurry because we are ready to be on our way. Suddenly 2 women have appeared behind us, looming over our shoulders, looking at the spice jars. One actually reaches in around us to grab a pack. We get several more packs and turn away, put them in our bag. Turn around and there are now 4 people gathered around the jars, looking at them, then putting them back. It appears we started a little frenzy - activating these shoppers radar that 'Some great deal must be here that I'm missing!' It was really odd.

3:30 - Searching for the checkout. Winding along the path. Still impossible amounts of people. Seeds of doubt have grown buds.

3:34 - Arrive at checkout. Discover another mass of people in a line. We reluctantly fall in.

3:39 - Creeper guy in line in front of us is repeatedly spanking his wife's ass with the door mat in his hand while she smiles serenely and ignores him. They are about 60-years old. Super annoying people in line behind us, loud and acting immature. Loudly uttering serious cuss words in front of their 5-year-old to make him laugh. Losing faith in the human race. 

3:45 - We cannot even speak we are so annoyed and want out of there so badly. The checker keeps doing something wrong and each transaction is taking too long. My partner's eyes are actually bloodshot. Seeds of doubt have bloomed ugly flowers.

3:48 - Finally checked out. Now waiting in line to go down escalator to street level. Decide to take stairs. Get out into open air. Look at each other in amazement. I believe he said, "I need a drink." I believe I said, "I need a frontal lobe cleansing."

Unfortunately this one experience has bloomed in us reason to never go back. Too bad. Really wanted those meatballs.